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Dr. Jordan's Blog on Relationships

9/12/2018 22 Comments

What is love addiction?

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​One of the clearest definitions of love addiction I have seen is "a compulsive, chronic craving and/or pursuit of romantic love in an effort to get our sense of security and worth from another person." Or, if you prefer something more pithy, author Ethlie Ann Vape calls it "affection deficit disorder". She goes on to say that "Every woman with an absent father-- whether through divorce, death, disease or distance-- is going to associate feelings of affection with feelings of abandonment" and therefore "confuse love and longing". That also seems pretty on target to me in terms of how people end up here. And men can be love addicts, too, and often have the same route to getting there-- a distant relationship with a parent that they desperately craved love and attention from. 

Of course it's normal to gain a sense of security from being in a romantic partnership and we tend to feel especially good about ourselves if our partner occasionally tells us how great they think we are. Those are good and normal things. But in love addiction those normal aspects of being partnered become turbo-charged in an effort to prop up our inability to actually feel good about ourselves without a romantic connection. And unfortunately our culture is all to quick to provide is with totally unrealistic ideas of what love is. 
Sofo Archon, in his article "The Trap of Romantic Love", states that "Just like pornography fools us into believing that perfect sex exists, the romantic tradition fools us into believing that perfect relationships exist." We are fed a steady diet of Rom-Coms and images of celebrities falling madly in love and swimming off into the sunset on their private Caribbean island. It all seems so AMAZING and, insanely, we think that we too can have that and it will last forever...

Since our culture is obsessed with both sex and romance so it's no wonder that many of us are confused about what is healthy. I remember after my daughter was born walking down the aisles of Toys R Us acquainting myself with what little girls may want to play with. I was absolutely stunned when, in the aisle for 3-6 year olds I came up on a giant box about 3 feet tall that contained a mini wedding dress, tiny white plastic shoes, a veil, plastic flowers and a fake diamond solitaire ring.  Yes, folks, it was a bride-in-a-box. The only thing needed was the poor hapless groom. I remember asking myself  "what are we teaching our girls?" and noting that there was no corresponding "groom-in-a-box" option in the boys 3-6 aisle. While boys were busy being introduced to fake power tools, fireman's outfits and play lawn mowers girls were being trained to get hitched up and knocked up all before the age of 6. Sadly it was not the last of those surprises  Then came all of the princess movies. The ones where princesses are cast into spells only to be awoken by a handsome prince. This was before the days of Frozen. And while Frozen is great, I still don't think it's enough to stem the tide of images that our girls absorb about the importance of romance and sex. Cosmopolitan magazine still has images of nearly eating-disordered young women scantily clad advising you on "how to give your man the best orgasm of his life" or "how to make him never forget you". The emphasis is still on a woman in relation to a man rather than as a stand-alone person. It's no wonder that MORE girls don't grow up to be love or sex addicts. 

So what is love addiction? Is it a "real" addiction? If so, what does it have in common with other addictions? How can you tell if you suffer from Love Addiction? And if you do, what can you do about it? 

One way to investigate whether or not the concept of Love Addiction might apply to you is to take an online test. The Center for Healthy Sex in Los Angeles, California has an online questionnaire that you can fill out. Love Addicts Anonymous (LAA) has their own version which may also be useful. I have worked with clients who used the Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA) program and found that helpful also. SLAA has their own questionnaire that you can download as a pdf. 

Once you decide whether or not you think you have a lot in common with this form of addiction what can you do? There are many ways to approach treatment. A qualified therapist can help you figure out what is unhealthy about how you create and participate in your romantic relationships and then format goals for what you would like to have with a partner. The therapist can help you develop a plan to achieve that goal which may involve therapy, support groups, readings and "homework" exercises to retrain your brain to relate romantically in a healthier way. Untreated love addiction, like any addiction, can create years or even decades of misery. By placing the love object at the center of your universe you lose the ability to know what is best for YOU and how to make decisions that will be equally beneficial to your partner AND yourself. This can result in a life that is woefully unfair and unfulfilling. The goal of treatment is to help you place yourself at the center of your priorities so that you can enter into a balanced relationship with others in which you enjoy them and value them but don't need them to plug holes in your self-esteem. 

This year (2018) at the SXSW Film Festival a movie entitled Unlovable got rave reviews. It was written by, and stars, a woman who is a love addict. It is not yet available to rent but keep a lookout for it. I am betting it is going to be moving and funny and a great insight into one person's personal experience in looking to fill that "affection deficit" in all the wrong ways. 

​In the meantime if you feel like you may have a problem with love addiction I strongly encourage you to take one (or more) of the tests mentioned in this blog. The first step to fixing a problem is diagnosing the problem. Many resources exist to help those with love and/or sex addictions (by the way they are different but can co-occur). Like most emotional disorders this pattern can be changed and the result can be a much more balanced, fulfilling and peaceful live. 

Wishing you health in your relationship to yourself as well as others,

Dr. Jordan

​

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22 Comments
popcorn time for ios link
11/24/2018 11:30:45 am

An interesting discussion is worth comment. I think that you should write more on this topic, it might not be a taboo subject but generally people are not enough to speak on such topics. To the next. Cheers

Reply
sandra butler
11/20/2020 05:56:45 am

EFFECTIVE AND POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER DR JUMBA +19085174108
I feel so blessed again in my marriage after Doctor jumba brought back my husband that separated with me for a good 6 months. My husband separated with me for  6 months and I have  been in pain and agony without him. So, i searched for help everywhere but nothing worked out not until i meant Doctor jumba who i contacted online. I explained my situation to him and he promised that my husband will get back to me within 24 to 48 hours as far as my heart still beats for him. I believed in him and he prepared a spell for me and my husband called me exactly when Doctor  jumba   said. He pleaded and said he needs me back and now we are living happily again for the past 9 months. Everyone out there reading my article that needs help should contact him.  via call : +19085174108 or wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com for more information check out his website : https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com/

Reply
sandra butler
11/20/2020 06:02:36 am

EFFECTIVE AND POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER DR JUMBA +19085174108
I feel so blessed again in my marriage after Doctor jumba brought back my husband that separated with me for a good 6 months. My husband separated with me for  6 months and I have  been in pain and agony without him. So, i searched for help everywhere but nothing worked out not until i meant Doctor jumba who i contacted online. I explained my situation to him and he promised that my husband will get back to me within 24 to 48 hours as far as my heart still beats for him. I believed in him and he prepared a spell for me and my husband called me exactly when Doctor  jumba   said. He pleaded and said he needs me back and now we are living happily again for the past 9 months. Everyone out there reading my article that needs help should contact him.  via call : +19085174108 or wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com for more information check out his website : https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com/

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dan morgan
3/23/2021 08:47:43 am

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5/16/2020 02:54:14 am

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Fiona Naughton
7/10/2020 10:56:38 am

I saw wonders, my Lover came back to me and my life got back just like a completed puzzle… am so happy.. thanks to Robinsonbuckler {@} yahoo. com for saving my relationship. Mr Robinson is the best I’ve ever met! Thanks,_________________________________((^_^)) Thank you!

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sandra butler
11/20/2020 06:01:20 am

EFFECTIVE AND POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER DR JUMBA +19085174108
I feel so blessed again in my marriage after Doctor jumba brought back my husband that separated with me for a good 6 months. My husband separated with me for  6 months and I have  been in pain and agony without him. So, i searched for help everywhere but nothing worked out not until i meant Doctor jumba who i contacted online. I explained my situation to him and he promised that my husband will get back to me within 24 to 48 hours as far as my heart still beats for him. I believed in him and he prepared a spell for me and my husband called me exactly when Doctor  jumba   said. He pleaded and said he needs me back and now we are living happily again for the past 9 months. Everyone out there reading my article that needs help should contact him.  via call : +19085174108 or wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com for more information check out his website : https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com/

Reply
sandra butler
11/20/2020 06:02:53 am

EFFECTIVE AND POWERFUL LOVE SPELL CASTER DR JUMBA +19085174108
I feel so blessed again in my marriage after Doctor jumba brought back my husband that separated with me for a good 6 months. My husband separated with me for  6 months and I have  been in pain and agony without him. So, i searched for help everywhere but nothing worked out not until i meant Doctor jumba who i contacted online. I explained my situation to him and he promised that my husband will get back to me within 24 to 48 hours as far as my heart still beats for him. I believed in him and he prepared a spell for me and my husband called me exactly when Doctor  jumba   said. He pleaded and said he needs me back and now we are living happily again for the past 9 months. Everyone out there reading my article that needs help should contact him.  via call : +19085174108 or wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com for more information check out his website : https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com/

Reply
Simon Patchin
12/4/2020 06:47:03 pm

I was married for 16 years to a loving mother and wife. We had 2 children together who are now 11 & 13. I reconnected with an old girlfriend from college on Facebook and we began an affair and I left my wife. The woman I had an affair with is a wonderful woman and I love her too and our kids had begun accepting the situation and my wife has kind of moved on, but not in love with the man she is seeing. I thought I fell out of love with my wife and I felt terrible about what I did to her - she is a good woman and I don't know what came over me. I decided to try and get her back and I was recommended to Lord Zakuza for help to get reunited with my wife and within 48 hours after I made contact with Lord Zakuza my wife decided to work things out with me and now we are back together with our children living as one happy family. I really don't know the words to use in appreciation of what Lord Zakuza did for me but I will say thank you sir for reuniting I and my family back. For those in trying times with their marriages or relationship can WhatsApp Lord Zakuza for help with this number +1 740 573 9483 or you can send him an email to Lordzakuza7@gmail.com

Reply
SARAH JOHNSON link
2/21/2021 02:19:51 pm

DR. ORMAN IS THE BEST SPELL CASTER ONLINE WHO RESTORED MY BROKEN RELATIONSHIP AND I HIGHLY RECOMMENDS DR. ORMAN TO ANYONE IN NEED OF HELP!

My husband left me for another woman 3 months ago and ever since then my life has been filled with pain, sorrow and heart break because he was my first love whom i have spent my entire life with. A friend of mine told me he saw some testimonies of a spell caster called Dr,Orman that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great spell caster on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after 2 days my husband called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through. He came back to me and now we are happy together. I still can’t believe it, because it's highly unbelievable. Thank you Dr,Orman for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great spell caster here is the email address: dr.orman980@yahoo.com you can also call him or add him on Whats-app:+905398102247

Reply
SARAH JOHNSON link
2/21/2021 02:20:55 pm

DR. ORMAN IS THE BEST SPELL CASTER ONLINE WHO RESTORED MY BROKEN RELATIONSHIP AND I HIGHLY RECOMMENDS DR. ORMAN TO ANYONE IN NEED OF HELP!

My husband left me for another woman 3 months ago and ever since then my life has been filled with pain, sorrow and heart break because he was my first love whom i have spent my entire life with. A friend of mine told me he saw some testimonies of a spell caster called Dr,Orman that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great spell caster on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after 2 days my husband called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through.He came back to me and now we are happy together. I still can’t believe it, because it's highly unbelievable. Thank you Dr,Orman for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great spell caster here is the email address: dr.orman980@yahoo.com you can also call him or add him on Whats-app:+905398102247

Reply
SARAH JOHNSON link
2/21/2021 02:21:56 pm

DR. ORMAN IS THE BEST SPELL CASTER ONLINE WHO RESTORED MY BROKEN RELATIONSHIP AND I HIGHLY RECOMMENDS DR. ORMAN TO ANYONE IN NEED OF HELP!

My husband left me for another woman 3 months ago and ever since then my life has been filled with pain, sorrow and heart break because he was my first love whom i have spent my entire life with. A friend of mine told me he saw some testimonies of a spell caster called Dr,Orman that he can bring back lover within some few days, i laugh it out and said i am not interested but because of the love my friend had for me, she consulted the great spell caster on my behalf and to my greatest surprise after 2 days my husband called me for the very first time after three months that he is missing me and that he is so sorry for every thing he made me went through.He came back to me and now we are happy together. I still can’t believe it, because it's highly unbelievable. Thank you Dr,Orman for bringing back my lover and also to my lovely friend who interceded on my behalf, for any one who might need the help of this great spell caster here is the email address: dr.orman980@yahoo.com you can also call him or add him on Whats-app:+905398102247

Reply
Pearl link
5/7/2021 12:40:06 am

How I Got My Ex Husband Back..Am so excited
share my testimony of a real spell caster
who brought my husband back to me. My
husband and I have been married for about 7
yrs now. We were happily married with two
kids, a boy and a girl. 3 months ago, I
started to notice some strange behavior from
him and a few weeks later I found out that
my husband is seeing someone else. He
started coming home late from work, he
hardly care about me or the kids anymore,
Sometimes he goes out and doesn't even come
back home for about 2-3 days. I did all I
could to rectify this problem but all to no
avail. I became very worried and needed
help. As I was browsing through the
internet one day, I came across a website
that suggested that Dr Sanni Moses can help solve
marital problems, restore broken
relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him
and and told him my problems and he told
me what to do and i did it and he did a
spell for me. 48 hours later, my husband
came to me and apologized for the wrongs he
did and promise never to do it again. Ever
since then, everything has returned back to
normal. I and my family are living together
happily again.. All thanks to Dr Sanni Moses
Powerful Love Spell that really works. If
you have any problem contact him and i guarantee you that he will help you. He
will not disappoint you. Email him @ Drsannimoses@gmail.com you can also reach him on WHATSAPP at +2347011911646 you can also visit his website ; https://sandrarohdan123.wixsite.com/drsannimoses

Reply
Abbie Moore
5/21/2021 05:00:49 am

Hi everyone, my name is Abbie Moore, am from the United States . I want to share my wonderful testimony how I got back my husband back, who I sworn ever to be with until when he left me to another woman for no reason and I try to make things work for both of us yet things where getting worse and I love him so much and there is nothing I could do to get my husband back until I saw a testimony share by a woman called Lauren from Australia on the internet talking about a powerful spell caster called DR. WALE, who brought her husband back within 24hours, so I decide to give it a try and to my greatest surprise he also did it for me just as he did for Lauren and I have a lot of people complaining of fake spell caster but this one I met was a real spell caster who help me to solve my problem I have no solution to, I introduce many of my best friends that have a similar problems, and their problem were solve with the great help of DR. WALE, who help them to get back their lovers within 24 hours. I am so happy that my husband is back to me again, and the most surprising thing is that our love is very strong, every day is happiness and joy. and there is nothing like been with the man you love. I am so happy my love is back to me with the help of DR. WALE. if you have similar problem I will advice you to contact him, he is there to help you and put a smile on your face as he did to me and others you can also WhatsApp him +1(978) 406-9575 or Email him at : everlastingspellcast@gmail.com or view his website for more review https://everlastingspellcaster.website2.me/contact

Reply
OLIVIA bolton
6/3/2021 09:08:27 pm

This testimony is worth sharing to the world. I am here to tell the world of the good works of  Dr BALBOSA. My name is Olivia Bolton am from the UK.. My man left me and my kids for another older woman. It was not so easy for me.. I love my husband so much and I did not lose hope and I kept praying and God finally answered my prayers...i searched online for a spell caster to help me unite me and my lover back forever and i saw so many testimonies of  how DR BALBOSA has helped so many people online and i decided to give him a trial … I contacted him and explained to him. He told me not to worry that he will bring back my man within 24 hours. He consulted his powers and assured me not to worry . He did his work and cast the spell and to my greatest surprise, my husband came back the same day begging and crying  just as  Dr BALBOSA said. He begged me for forgiveness and he promised never to leave me for any reason. We are happy and we live together as one. Contact Dr BALBOSA now and be happy forever. dont lose hope and good luck..

EMAIL on:: balbosasolutionhome@gmail.com
WHATSAPP AND CALL: +1(206) 485-3691
WEBSITE: https://balbosasolutionhome.com

Reply
OLIVIA bolton
6/3/2021 09:09:07 pm

This testimony is worth sharing to the world. I am here to tell the world of the good works of  Dr BALBOSA. My name is Olivia Bolton am from the UK.. My man left me and my kids for another older woman. It was not so easy for me.. I love my husband so much and I did not lose hope and I kept praying and God finally answered my prayers...i searched online for a spell caster to help me unite me and my lover back forever and i saw so many testimonies of  how DR BALBOSA has helped so many people online and i decided to give him a trial … I contacted him and explained to him. He told me not to worry that he will bring back my man within 24 hours. He consulted his powers and assured me not to worry . He did his work and cast the spell and to my greatest surprise, my husband came back the same day begging and crying  just as  Dr BALBOSA said. He begged me for forgiveness and he promised never to leave me for any reason. We are happy and we live together as one. Contact Dr BALBOSA now and be happy forever. dont lose hope and good luck..

EMAIL on:: balbosasolutionhome@gmail.com
WHATSAPP AND CALL: +1(206) 485-3691
WEBSITE: https://balbosasolutionhome.com

Reply
Carla Houston
6/8/2021 09:03:01 am

I'm so excited my broken Marriage has been restored. My ex husband is back after he left me and our 2kids for another woman. I was so happy to meet Dr. OKu how he helps many people to bring their Lover back so i contact him to help me too. husbandThat was how Dr. Oku helped me to bring my  back.. A big thank you to Dr. Oku because I never thought my ex Husband will be back to me so quickly with your spell. You are the best and world greatest. If you are here and you need your Ex Let you in over back or your husband moves to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster now. Here’s his contact:Email him at: okutemple@gmail.com You can also Call/WhatsApp:+2348163425519

Reply
Jenny Laurels
6/14/2021 09:00:34 am

**********PLEASE DON'T PASS THIS COMMENT WITHOUT READING**********Hello my name is JENNY LAURELS from USA i want to tell the world about the great and mighty spell caster called PRIEST OSAS my husband was cheating on me and no longer committed to me and our kids when i asked him what the problem was he told me he has fell out of love for me and wanted a divorce i was so heart broken i cried all day and night but he left home i was looking for something online when i saw an article how the great and powerful PRIEST OSAS have helped so many in similar situation like mine he email address was there so i sent him an email telling him about my problem he told me he shall return back to me within 24hrs i did everything he asked me to do the next day to my greatest surprise my husband came back home and was crying and begging for me to forgive and accept him back he can also help you.

CONTACT HIM:


EMAIL:Unsurpassed.solution@gmail.com
VIA PAGE https://www.facebook.com/unsurpassed.solution1
https://mywa.link/priestosas
WhatsApp +2348151243832

Reply
Berlin Claire
7/1/2021 01:23:34 pm

After being married for four years, My husband just decide to walk away. I did everything within my reach to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so badly because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused.I explained my problem to my friend and she suggested that I should rather contact Dr Ilekhojie that he could help me cast reconciliation spell to bring him back. I had no choice than to try it. I messaged Dr Ilekhojie and he assured me there was no problem and that everything will be okay before three days. He cast the spell and surprisingly on the second day, my husband called me. I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that had happened he wanted me to return to him. You can also contact Dr Ilekhojie if you need help

1) Love Spells
2) Lost Love Spells
3) Divorce Spells
4) Marriage Spells
5) Binding Spell.
6) Breakup Spells

WhatsApp Dr Ilekhojie on (+2348147400259) or Email (gethelp05@gmail.com)

Reply
jasmine robert
7/6/2021 05:18:28 pm

Thank you Dr Jumba for your genuine spells. This is really incredible, and I have never experienced anything like this in my life. Before I came in contact with Dr Jumba, I have tried every possible means that I could to get my husband back, but I actually came to realize that nothing was working out for me, and my husband had developed a lot of hatred for me.. I thought there was no hope of reuniting with my husband until my friend told me about dr jumba and she gave me dr jumba website i googled it and read good reviews about Dr Jumba work , I decided to give it a try and I did everything that he instructed me and I trusted in him and followed his instructions just as he had guaranteed me in 24 hours, and that was exactly when my husband called me and ask for forgiveness that he his on his way to my house .. We are good more than ever. Everything looks perfect and so natural! Thank you so much for your authentic and indisputable spells. Thank you Dr Jumba for your help. If you need help in your marriage or broken relationship, contact Dr Jumba right now for urgent help Email: wiccalovespelltools@gmail.com OR wiccalovelovespelltools@yahoo.com View his website https://drjumbaspellhome.wordpress.com/ Call/WhatsApp him: +19085174108

Reply
Nobert Lauren
10/10/2021 05:09:21 pm

HOW I GOT CURED OF MY HERPES SIMPLEX VIRUS BY DR ISHIAKU

I have never had a STD before and had never had unprotected sex. However, I had a boyfriend (ex), who at that time had a cold sore. Frankly, we assumed that it was just a spot because we never came to know about herpes until now. We engaged in oral sex, and that’s how I got herpes. Thank God that I found Dr. Ishiaku online who prepared me a herbal remedy that I only took for 1 month with faith, then I went for a check up and I was totally cured(herpes Negative). His medication has no SIDE EFFECT,there is no special diet when taking drugs
You can contact him on his email: (ishiakuherbalcure@yahoo.com)or what - sapp him via (+2348180828544) and get all your problems solved.


visit his website more info : www.ishiakuherbalcure.wordpress.com

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Lerynne West
12/14/2021 09:19:29 am

I never knew lottery spells existed until I was referred to Dr Amber by my neighbor. I have been playing lottery games for the past 7 years and I have never won above $2,000 but after I came in contact with Dr Amber, I told him my past experience about playing lottery of which I have never won big amount and Dr Amber told me what will be done by praying and preparing a lottery spell for me. He did that and gave me some numbers to play the lottery game. At first I took everything as a joke until I was emailed a week after that I had won the sum of $343.9 million. I was shocked and surprised at that very moment because my long awaited prayers had finally been answered and I thank Dr Amber for helping me out for my financial status to change and that of my generations. If you want to win a huge amount on your next lottery game, contact Dr Amber now and I assure you that your bold step will be your change of level.

Email him via: amberlottotemple@yahoo.com or Call/WhatsApp this number +1 (406) 646-2222 for immediate response.

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